I was browsing through my old journals and came across a letter I had written a little over 2 years ago titled My Future Beloved. Its funny reading back through some of my past entries, I don't remember writing most of them. However, I distinctly remember writing this. It was during a time of healing from some past hurt and being loved on by the Lord. I supposed being Valentines day I wanted to share this.
My Future Beloved,
As the days, months and years pass I have learned troubles, heart aches and pain. I have also experiences sheer joy, happiness and love. Through the thick and thin one thing remained certain, no matter what, my faith will stay strong. The Lord has kept me strong. My mom always taught me to dream big, have faith in that dream and to believe that it will happen through the Lord. I remember the night I asked the Lord for you. Scripture says all through out about asking the Lord for our hearts desires and believing the impossible. You are my impossible. I made a serious but tough prayer a while back. I was scared that I would lose the passions and faith in my dream. I asked the Lord for a sort of accountability. I knew the prize I had prayed for was magnificent in my eyes and I didn't want anything to get in the way of that. When you fall for someone, I believe, that you give a piece of your heart away. I prayed that the Lord would not only hold and protect my heart but protect me from giving it away to the wrong guys. I didn't actually realize how tough it was going to be. However, no matter what happens the Lord always reminds me of my desire, my dream, my prayer. I don't even know you and I am already in such a deep love with you. A love that only the Lord could have set in my heart. Everyday, I pray that the Lord is not only working in my heart but also in yours, to mold us and make us into the man and woman of God he needs us to be. It is so hard, fighting each day as the world crashes mountains on our shoulders. It is so tough standing firm while Satan does everything in his power to make us fall, but stand strong in the Lord my love, lean on Him. He can move those mountains! I am learning this lesson everyday. I pray that the Lord brings peace and joy in this next chapter of your life. I pray that each and every day the Lord reveals more and more of himself to you, building you strong in him. Most of all, I pray for the protection of your heart. Protection from temptations, impurities, heartaches and pain. To you, I am making a vow, in the Lords name to save my whole heart for you. To not give into worldly temptations and stand strong. I know I am no where near perfect and I mess up daily. But I without a doubt know in my heart that you are more than worth it. I can not wait to actually meet you!
"Blessed is she who has believed that what the Lord has said to her will be accomplished"
- Luke 1:45
"For nothing is impossible with God"
- Luke 1:37
"Ask and it will be given to you; see and you will find; knock and the door will be open to you"
I love you Justin!
Happy Valentines Day!